November 7th marks the 32nd anniversary of my bearing the title Mrs., one that carried many more responsibilities than I was aware of when I received it back in 1975. In fact, it is safe to say that I had no substantial guidelines in place back then from which to operate. I figured it couldn't be all that difficult or different to be married - after all most people ended up married and I was at least as capable as they.
It wasn't until I embraced the perspectives of Scripture that I began to see that there were definite standards by which to judge myself as a good or bad wife and to determine whether or not I had a good marriage. Parenting added to the mix in a positive way, because it forced me to become organized and consistent in how I approached my duties. Thanks to a biblical worldview, duties became much more important than rights. I learned that I had the right to remain obedient (to God and His Word), and blessings would result when I obeyed, and the opposite would result when I didn't.
Many acknowledge the vital role that the mother plays in the homeschooling endeavor. But, I think far too little credit is given to the same woman's role as wife. The success of a homeschool has as much to do with how a woman relates to her husband as it does how she relates to her children. Unfortunately, not a lot of preparation goes into the education of young girls in this area. We spend lots of time ensuring they know the basic academic subjects, and possibly how to perform household tasks, but do we really encourage training in how to be a good wife? Culturally, much more time is spent on planning the wedding than on planning the marriage.
I am forever grateful for the theological and mentoring assistance of two departed saints who have as much to do with this anniversary being reached as my husband and I. For it was through those many Sundays spent in Vallecito, CA under the tutelage of the Rushdoonys--Rush and Dorothy--that we learned how to value and care for our marriage. In many ways, it's their anniversary as well.
- Andrea G. Schwartz
Andrea Schwartz is Chalcedon’s family and Christian education advocate, and the author of eight books including: A House for God: Building a Kingdom-Driven Family, The Biblical Trustee Family: Understanding God’s Purpose for Your Household, Empowered: Developing Strong Women for Kingdom Service, Woman of the House: A Mother’s Role in Building a Christian Culture, and The Homeschool Life: Discovering God’s Way to Family-Based Education. She’s also the co-host of the Out of the Question podcast, the Chalcedon podcast, and has an active teaching schedule with women and high schooled students.. She can be reached at [email protected].