My oldest daughter, Cassie, is 18 and graduated just shy of her 17th birthday. We decided to have a graduation ceremony and celebration for her. This was not her first choice. If it were up to her, we would have had a nice dinner and we hand her a certificate. However, we like to nudge (or throw) our kids out of their comfort zones so they can grow in those weak areas.
This particular daughter has a sharp mind and is a logical thinker but is more reserved and doesn’t talk to a lot to people until she is comfortable. She tends to let her sister (Savannah, our extrovert) do more of the conversing when they are in a group conversation.
It was quite an experience as we were getting closer to graduation and people started asking Cassie what she will do after graduation. A woman at church came up to her one day and Cassie was sharing how excited she was that graduation was almost here. The woman asked her what she was going to do after graduation, and asked was she going to college. Cassie’s reply was “no, I plan to learn how to be a wife and a mother” as she had a huge grin on her face. Crickets followed for what seemed like an eternity. At first, I was embarrassed and told my daughter to let other people know that she is doing more than that. Let them that we are entrepreneurial minded and that she has cottage industries that she does, not to mention the fact that she helps her father with his business. Soon after, I realized I was doing a disservice to her. Why was training to be a wife and mother one day, not good enough? Why did I feel I needed to make her resume look more impressive? I quickly stopped encouraging her to supplement her responses and let her continue to answer the way she had...grin and all.
You see, our daughter was raised to delight in her role as woman, and, Lord willing, as a future wife and mother. She has been taught that it is the highest calling of a woman and why would she want to settle for less. This position has been a shock to a number of people she has told, but she continues to proclaim it boldly. Some people see her as being held back by her parents, oppressed, or will have a lack of intelligence just reducing herself to such a role. She does not see it this way. She knows God word and seeks to do His will.
She has learned a number of skills and continues to gain more because she has no idea what a future husband may be doing and what she will need to help. I think people assume homemakers just stay home and cook, clean house and have babies. While these things may be part of it, the role of a wife and mother are so much more than that.
A wife is a helpmeet to her husband, doing those things needed to help further his vision. She is chief counselor to her husband, knowing the word of God alongside him, giving godly counsel when needed. She is his greatest encourager, and she is the mother of his children. She manages a household, and teaches her children diligently, in the fear and admonition of the Lord. A lot a famous, great, godly men attribute their success to their mothers’ and/or wives’ role in their lives.
So, let the questions keep coming and let her delight in her role that God gave her. And, knowing how important our role as a wife/mother is, let us be reminded of that on those days when we have little ones and it seems like all we do is cook and clean.
- Jenni Zimmerman
Jenni is a homeschooling mom. She and her husband, Chris, live in Washington state with their four children. The entire family are earnest students of Biblical law.